Thank you..

Okay, so in my procrastinating mode, pushing of my exam-reading... I really shouldn't take time to this now, but...

I was just listening to this song by Secret Garden, and when I heard the second verse it hit me.. "We have just one life to seize the day, We only have what time there is to say…"
Do the people in my life know how much they mean to me? Do they know how much I love them? What if something happened, and I'd never get the chance to tell them again? I think I would regret not taking the chance I got... so, this is to you, all the amazing people in my life, long lost friends, all of you I see everyday, all of you whom I wish I was better at staying in touch with, all of you who has influenced my life in ways you might never really understand the depth and importance of, all of you who in one way or another has shaped my life, challenged me, and been a part of making me the one I am today... I want you to know I love you, and I'm really greatful for the part you've had in shaping my life. To all of you who have been around for the not-so-good-days of my life, thanks for sticking by, helping me through, helping me see the truth. To all of you who have been there through the celebrations, thanks for celebrating with me. And to all of you who have been there through the normal, ordinary days, thanks for being the amazing friends you really are. I appreciate you more than words can say!!

This is to all of you!! THANK YOU!!!

If I lived to be a thousand years,
If I ruled the word – it’s hemispheres,
I could not repay the love you brought my way,
So, I want to say it now
To thank you for each day you gave me.

Thank you for the Mondays,
Saturdays and Sundays,
Everyday, the whole year through;
Thank you for the fun days,
All those number-one days,
Battles-to-be-won days, too;
I just want to say it,
Thank you for each day with…you.

We have just one life to seize the day,
We only have what time there is to say…
‘n’do what we must do, express our gratitude,
So, I want to say it and sing it now to you.

Thank you for the Mondays,
Saturdays and Sundays,
Everyday, the whole year through;
Thank you for the fun days,
All those number-one days,
Battles-to-be-won days, too;
I just want to say it,
Thank you for each day with…you.

At the close of every day,
When I close my eyes to pray,
All I need to do, is just to think of you…
Then, all I need to say…is…

Thank you for the Mondays,
Saturdays and Sundays,
Everyday, the whole year through;
Thank you for the fun days,
All those number-one days,
Battles-to-be-won days, too;
I just want to say it,
Thank you for each day with…you.

sometimes...

…I find it hard to try to live this picture perfect life of mine.
…I can’t seem to be able to live up to this perfect image of me that everyone has. Coz I know that couldn’t be further from the truth…
… I feel the picture crack, just because of some tiny thing that shouldn’t matter, not if I were the person everyone seems to believe I am anyways…

Really don’t know how to handle this. It always seems to come back to the same old things. It’s always the same things that make me fall, make the picture crack, and I can’t seem to be able to do something about it. Every time it seems as if I get a hold of things, and life seems to be great, it comes back, and I just don’t know how to change it, how to change me. I find a way of changing, and it falls away, somehow things doesn’t turn out the way I hoped, the way I wanted, the way I thought I needed them to.

… I feel like I’m just wearing a mask, hiding the real me from everyone else around me.
… I think I’m even tricking myself with this mask.

I’m tired, so tired of this mask, of doing this roundabout thing over and over again. I really can’t take it, can’t afford to do it anymore, but I have no idea of how to break out.

God, can You take this, can You fight this battle for me? Coz I don’t know how to fight it anymore…
All I know is that I need You, and that I need You bad, right now! Don’t know how to deal with this unless You promise You’ll be there with me.

…the perfect picture is breaking,
And sometimes… I think that’s a good thing…